Look What You Made Me Do by Taylor Swift

I can’t very well tell you about playing sports in Indiana without the follow up story.  I had just been through a roller coaster of a week.  After three intense weeks of dating someone new, he tells me he is going to have dinner with his ex wife who he hadn’t seen in 4 years.  It was supposedly to clear the air because they had mutual friends coming into town and were bound to see each other?  I don’t know.  In any case, he drove immediately to my house after this dinner to tell me he was confused and we should end this.  I was understandably confused and upset.  2 nights later he texted me to ask if I wanted to talk.  I said ok.  He said open the door.  As in, he was in my driveway.  Kinda creepy, I know, but it led to this:   When I opened the door, in my pajamas, he peered around the house and said:  So this is what it looks like when someone drops in unexpectedly.  I look around at the completely spotless house, nary a cushion askew, and say: Yep!  In any case, he said he was confused and under pressure, but we are back on.  Ok then.  Well come Friday to our scheduled date, he breaks up with me AGAIN because he feels uncomfortable.  Thankfully, I have very very good girlfriends and Kyla J. came to the rescue.  We took advantage of the sitter I had scheduled and went out all by our damn selves!

We peeked into the first bar my cousin had recommended and it was a little scary and also empty.  We went across the street to a hip place where they had live music.  Well, it was bluesy jazzy quiet kind of music which gave me way too much access to my thoughts and I ended up crying into my cocktail.  We went across the street to another dive.  I marched up to the jukebox, selected some angry Taylor Swift, and marched myself right up to some guys playing darts, ahem, sports and announced I would be playing.  Let’s just say I did not have a repeat of my Indiana performance.  

Kyla’s husband came for her and I decided to finish my beer.  One of the guy’s from darts suggested walking up to the other bar and I said I was game for that.  When we got outside, he asked if I wanted to smoke out of his car bong.  Car Bong.  I was picturing the muffler or I don’t even know what, but I was intrigued.  You will be as disappointed as I was to learn it was just a bong he keeps in his car. 

We go into the bar and while I was putting in my Uber request, a bar fight, complete with shirts being torn and bar stools flung, breaks out right behind me.  Allow me to recap.  Instead of being out on a date with someone I really liked…..it was a car bong and a bar fight kind of night.  After the fight fizzled, patrons of the bar said they’d never seen me in there and this was their neighborhood bar and a really great place, ordinarily.  I said I was sure of that, thanks so much, gotta go!  And I have never been back.

Dance (A$$) by Big Sean

It was a brisk 40 degrees in late January in Carmel, IN.  You pronounce it with the emphasis on the CAR, not the MEL, like you would in California.  I was on a work trip.  Before we left the client site, we had asked for a dinner recommendation.  The client recommended something (which was great) and then turned to his employee and reminded him that they had “sports” later that night.  I inquired which sport they might be participating in, in the middle of winter.  Somewhat sheepishly he replied:  Darts.  And beer.  Yes, I know that sounds like the punchline to the evening, but it’s important to the overall story!  My co-worker and I had just finished dinner and opted for a stroll around downtown Carmel.  As you do in 40 degree weather.  She suggested one more round, so we ducked into a bar.

It was a neighborhood kind of bar, but most noticeably to this Californian, people were smoking.  Inside the bar.  It cost me $40 in dry cleaning to get the smell out of my coat later. I go up to the bar to procure drinks and order something I see on tap. Maybe a Stella?  The bartender says they are out of it.  I try something else.  No dice.  I finally request a Coors Light.  Do they have Coors Light?!  Success!  I bring the beers over to my co worker and we cheers.  A couple polite young (very young!) Indiana gentlemen ask if we might like to play darts with them.  I look at my co worker and shrug and say I could go for some “sports”.  They look at us quizzically, but we are on.  Girls vs. Boys.  And we proceed to kick some ass. I had never played in my life, but somehow I get 5 bulls-eyes during that round.  We later swapped partners and had a completely excellent evening full of bulls-eyes, beers, hilarious conversation, and excellent music on the jukebox.  At one point in the evening, someone asked whose coat was taking up a bar stool.  I said it (the fur lined, suede, fur collar, belted jacket I bought in Spain) was mine.  He said OF COURSE it is mine.  It’s the “I’m from California and it’s going to be cold but I want to look fabulous” coat.  And that’s exactly what I was going for with it.  

We got a ride back to the hotel from the nice young gentlemen and I showed my age because there was a song playing that I had never ever heard.  It’s not really my genre and I definitely can’t play it around the kids.  It has the word Ass in the name of the song for goodness sake.  He was blasting it as we barreled down the main strip in downtown Carmel in his (jeep? I think?).  I’m still in touch with the nice young men and they definitely give the name to Midwestern manners, except I suppose for the song with the word Ass in it. 

Mr Jones by Counting Crows

I had just returned from a year in Germany and after speaking almost exclusively in German for an entire year, my English was coming out with a German accent.  So much, in fact, that people who didn't know me questioned if I was actually German.  This made me really happy.  We were at... Mike S's house (i think) watching a movie, squished into the sofa.  There were at least 4 of us all nestled in, I remember specifically Erik P and Nic P.  We got on the topic of music and I brought up Mr Jones.  Nic was so tickled by my pronunciation of the song that he became known as Mr Jones (to me and to me alone). 

A few years later my friend Kevin A invited me to the Counting Crows show at the Greek in Berkeley.  I could've actually listened to the show from my dorm room window, but being AT the show was obviously very different.  To be honest, I wasn't a very big fan of the band, but who am I to turn down a free ticket with one of my favorite friends?  So I went.  Adam Duritz is from Berkeley and I had heard he was at LaVal's in Northside prior to the show which I thought was really cool.  What I thought was less cool was that throughout the show he was teetering on the edge of the stage and I was concerned he might fall off.  Then to top things off, when they played Mr Jones, it was a stripped down, slow version.  In other words, the one song I was familiar with was almost unrecognizable.  I actually spent the majority of the show staring up into the heavens at the Hale Bopp Comet, which was in full glory in the night sky. 

I'm going to see the Counting Crows tonight and something tells me it's going to be a completely different experience from top to bottom.  I cannot wait.

Electric Love by the Borns

I was sitting in the Aloft Hotel with 2 of my co-workers, having just the best time.  Anne H and I had just spent hours upon hours talking and catching up.  I'm not even kidding.  We talked all the way to the airport, waiting for our plane, the 3 1/2 hour flight to Dallas, and the Uber ride to the hotel.  Would you believe we weren't done yet?  Upon arriving at the Aloft, we proceeded to the hotel bar to catch up with our co-workers.  I cannot tell you what a treat it is to attend the annual team summit. I work from home exclusively, but once in a while it's really nice to see all of the people I normally only hear on the phone.  Add to that the complete freedom from responsibility (read: 2 tiny humans who rely on me for absolutely everything) and I was in heaven.

Anne, James S and I enjoyed some well deserved cocktails and talked (and talked). No shop talk, just fun, goofy, gossipy goodness.  James told us all about the very fancy sneakers he was contemplating purchasing for his upcoming wedding.  I was initially shocked at the price tag on said sneakers, until I remembered the price tag on my wedding dress.  Seemed fair, not to mention the shoes are pretty snazzy.  We discussed in great detail the foot pop, a la the Princess Diaries, he absolutely must perform to showcase the red soles!  While we were chatting, I of course noticed the music playing in the bar because of course I did.  The Aloft is a very hip hotel, with a pool table in the lobby, techno playing in the elevator, you get the picture.  Electric Love was the perfect fit for the ambience in the hotel and especially in the moment.  It's catchy and addicting and cheerful and oh so hip.  Nice job Aloft.  You put me in the perfect moment surrounded by the perfect people to enjoy it.  I'd like to say we closed down the bar and we probably did.  I was having too much fun to notice, soon to be followed by 2 more nights just like it!

Lean On by Major Lazar

It was almost a year post divorce and after trying, unsuccessfully, to date, I had decided what I really needed was some fun.  And by fun, I mean young.  I looked amazing, thinner than I had ever been, and I wasn't ready for some heavy duty relationship.  I just needed an escape from the day-to-day, full time mom gig.  Enter Matt.  He needed a diversion from studying and living with his parents.  It was the ideal situation for both of us.  He was a welcome distraction and happily texted me all day long.  He would come over in the evenings to hang out with me and watch tv.  After the first week, he left on a road trip, sending me pictures of all the fun things he noticed and did along the way.  I noticed that he was a lot of fun, so I asked him if we could go out some weekend and look for some fun.  His response:  Napa, wine tasting, hotel, massages?  Mine:  Are you kidding?  YES PLEASE.

Now you never know how a trip with someone you barely know is going to work out. The good news is that it was a fantastic weekend, devoid of any awkwardness.  Matt was a member of several wine clubs, so we received the royal treatment at the wineries.  Everything was low key and easy, relaxing and fun. Relaxing and fun was the key to our entire relationship and exactly what we needed.  Matt introduced me to meal sharing.  No matter what we were eating, burgers, meal entrees, we would always split everything and share which is really the best way to go.  He was considerate and thoughtful throughout and it was a memorable trip in so many ways.  One of them was when we were getting ready to go somewhere, perhaps the hot tub, and I was playing one of my many playlists.  He started singing along to a very popular song of the summer.  It was cute.  It will forever remind me of the getaway to Napa and the start of finding the old me, buried underneath some rubble. 

La Isla Bonita by Madonna

You would think I'm going to be digging into the memory archives on this one, but you would be wrong.  After an entire week of overcast weather, we're going back to the sunshine filled days of summer.  Specifically last summer in Belize.  It was turning out to be the perfect celebration of my 40th birthday with my now very dear friend Carli M.  Upon hearing that we were heading to Ambergris Caye for the second half of our trip, our delightful tour guide Walter starting humming La Isla Bonita.  That lyric:  "last night I dreamt of San Pedro"?  I'd always thought it was just some made up island that Madonna created for her catchy tune.  Nope.  It's a real place. And we were headed there. You better Belize I totally dorked out about it, too.

I had decided that since I had scored such a deal on our hotel that we would fly to the Isla Bonita.  Honestly, a 15 minute flight vs a 90 minute cramped boat ride?  There was no choice really.  The island lives up to its name.  It IS beautiful, laid back, truly the island life.  The plan for the island was no plan at all, save for renting a golf car to tour the island, however we initially balked at the price.  That is until I was sitting in a hammock, sipping on my welcome rum cocktail, and the delightful Deepak K and Larissa M who had just checked in turned to me and asked what the plan was for tomorrow.  The 4 of us embarked on an adventure in the morning to the "Secret Beach" on the north side of the island.  Carli braved the potholes and suffered the embarrassment of being passed by local golf cart drivers.  In her defense, she had the pedal to the metal, but maybe their golf carts were turbo charged? 

Following the secret beach, we continued on our lop-along day, stopping for lunch.  Deepak wished he could just find someone to take us on a short trip out to the reef.  Done and Done!  I negotiated a quick trip out to the barrier reef for some snorkeling with Captain Chip.  After getting up close and personal with some sting rays and sea urchins, we returned to our hotel and eventually home.  Last night I dreamt of San Pedro.  I prayed that the days would last, they went so fast.