Porcelain by Moby

It was shaping up to be one of the very best summers of my life.  I have had some excellent summers, but this one was really becoming a contender for the best of the best.  So far.  I was only 22 that year in the summer of 2000.  It was the halcyon days of tech which meant I was finally meeting my sales quota with some regularity.  I scored a corner seat in the new office and a computer which meant I could download songs at work.  I loved my sales team and my clients.  We were young, making money, and living in San Francisco.  We regularly went out for drinks after work that often turned into dinners.  I was also back to my fighting weight, I had lots of suits and heels, a new hairdresser and blond highlights.  I had met a very cute boy at the beginning of summer and was looking forward to a trip to Hawaii with him at the end of August.

But in the meantime.....there were summer BBQs to host and attend.  My Spanish roommate Jordi C. had emailed me to ask if I could pick him up from the airport....in Los Angeles.  That was 300 miles away from me and I did not have a car, but I flew down to LA to spend an awesome couple days with Alex F. and Pam S.  That is a story for another song.  I went to family BBQs and pool parties.  There was a trip to Santa Cruz where I attempted surfing.  I even crammed in a camping trip to Silver Lake.  It was fun times after fun times. 

My sister introduced me to the Moby Play album that summer.  I had heard some earlier Moby stuff that was more doz-doz techno kind of stuff.  It was ok.  But this album was amazing.  I fell in love with it and listened to it over and over.  The thing is, the music made me feel incredibly sad.  Or maybe melancholy is a better word.  I just looked it up and it is definitely the right word:
melancholy: a feeling of pensive sadness, typically with no obvious cause.

This is probably what he was going for as the lyrics are incredibly sad.  In my dreams I'm dying all the time.  I never meant to hurt you.  So this is goodbye.  Another song on the album is called Why Does My Heart Feel So Bad.  SAD!  Super sad stuff!  It's funny that in the middle of all the awesome that was that summer, I would obsessively listen to an album that made me feel melancholy. There's probably some juicy stuff in there for a psychologist to figure out.